33 Acres Brewing Company

Location: Main Street Brewery District
Year Opened: 2013
Recent BC Beer Award Wins: 2017 – Belgian Ale (Acres of Sunshine) 2016 – International Lager (Acres of Darkness), Amber Ale (Acres of Life), Trappist (Acres of Euphoria)
Recent Canadian Beer Awards Wins: NA

Rank in Vancouver: 15th place (out of 25)
Rank in Metro Vancouver: 33rd place (out of 48)
Rank in Southwestern B.C.: 53rd place (out of 77)

33 Acres is a brewery that could have been a location in that episode of Black Mirror where oppressively picturesque social media destroys Bryce Dallas Howard’s life.

33 Acres is a brewery that sells $125 sweatshirts, ceramic growlers, gourmet ice cream and third-wave coffee.

33 Acres is a brewery made by and for design nerds, not beer nerds, and it really shows.

Spending time at 33 Acres feels like climbing inside an Instagram photo — it’s well-composed but cropped, crammed-in, lifeless and extremely predictable.

33 Acres is a great place to look back on having been at, but not a very good place to actually be at.

33 Acres makes the most overrated beer in the Lower Mainland.

SO MUCH WHITE (Flickr/mikethefifth)
SO MUCH WHITE (Flickr/mikethefifth)

It’s not awful. It’s certainly not the worst beer we’ve ever had. But overall, the brews themselves are just okay, and they absolutely don’t deserve the level of fawning hype fans keep giving them. Our reviewers disagreed on a lot of things, but nearly everyone agreed on this: 33 Acres’ beers are samey, shrill, unbalanced and awkward much more often than they’re inspired.

This place doesn’t branch out to try anything more interesting than dark ales or citrus reds, despite obviously having the capacity to do so. They aren’t working to make established styles excellent, either. They appear to be putting very little thought into advancing their brewing, and it’s easy to see why: they don’t have to. Fans are already committed to the pitch-perfect, Kinfolk-ready branding, and 33 Acres knows it.

According to Tantalus Labs, an eco-friendly artisanal cannabis outfit with a design-focused blog (kindly fill in the appropriate square on your Vancouver Bingo board now), “the 33 Acres brand is anchored in a product-first mentality.”

No, we have no idea what this means either.

Quality: 11.9/20 (53rd)
Standout: 3.1/5 (41st)
Diversity: 5.4/10 (57th)
Innovation: 2.2/5 (56th)
Experience: 6.5/10 (54th)
TOTAL: 29.4 (53rd)

Next in Metro Vancouver: Parkside
Next in Southwest B.C.: Whistler

Categories: Brewery RankingsTags: , ,


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